Hard Moments
Life can be hard… let me give you some examples as of late:
// My Dad and a few of my family members tested positive with COVID
// This month marks 5 years since my Mom passed away and entered her eternal life
// We’re in a really rainy, gloomy and cold season in WA
Don’t worry– I’m truly okay and don’t need empathy, I promise!
I am sharing some hard truths with you to let you know that THESE MOMENTS HAPPEN. Eventually we learn something from the hard moments and things start to shift because nothing stays constant. I have grown more appreciative for the hard moments that occur in my life. They always tend to jolt me back in gratitude of my normal life.
Those hard moments I shared with you are all disruptions of my norm, and required me to pivot and think of new ideas and possibilities:
// I stayed prayerful, faithful and calm for my family who felt like crap and had to isolate themselves from the rest of the family and America. I connected more on a daily basis with my family to ensure they were okay and they had what they needed to feel as comfortable as possible.
// I thought about my Mom a lot and pondered how she would feel watching my kiddos grow up with sass. I cried as I thought about how much I miss her, and then I sat in gratitude for her fun, loving and strong spirit she carried and left on this earth.
// I really have to be intentional in getting ourselves outside at least once a day, rain or shine. We started tracking our time outside following the 1000 Hours Outside challenge and mother nature is life giving for us all!
It may seem unreasonable to think you can go from OMG THIS IS HARD… to I GOT THIS type of mentality, but reaching a point of action is totally do-able with time and practice. Here are a few steps of a process that might be of help to you the next time your hard moment occurs:
Feel – Think of the hard moment you are experiencing as an indicator to check in with yourself and your feelings. Don’t fight the hardship and DO NOT ignore it. Give yourself time to express what the hardship is bringing to you. The trick is not to let yourself feel the hardship beyond the day it occurred.
Reflect – Give yourself time and space to journal or verbalize your response to a few key questions: What is the disruption that the hard moment is creating? What’s uncomfortable about it? What’s the gift or opportunity that might be in this hard moment?
Desires – Once you release the negative feelings, think about what you really want to feel. How might you embrace the gift and grow from it? Think about the best case scenario for you and stay with those feeling – maybe it’s relief, presence, compassion, empathy… name it and claim it!
Permission – What permission do you need to stay in the desired feeling and move forward from the hard moment? It might be permission from yourself or from someone else you know. Stating your permission frees you to move on and not revert back into the hard feelings.
Action – Through taking action, you are moving forward… taking your learnings and putting them into practice. For example, with my Mom’s eternal life, the action I eventually took was talking about her with my husband and kiddos, thinking about what we have done in years prior to honor her life on earth. New insights are great, and taking action upon those insights is where your growth lies.
We all get through hard moments, and yet there’s always room for improvement. I challenge you to get through the next hard moment with intention, in service of YOU.
You can do hard things! If you’re not uncomfortable, you’re not growing!
Light + Love,
Bev
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